


State Borders

by Papa Argent



Category: iCarly
Genre: Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2011-09-26
Updated: 2011-10-25
Packaged: 2015-06-11 18:14:09
Rating: T
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,093
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7415947/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/3280973/Papa-Argent
Summary: After graduation, Sam convinces Freddie to drive across the country instead of going to school for the fall semester, this is what happens when you listen to Sam. R&R. Little drama, little laughter, little romance, a whole lotta meat.





	1. September Skyline

**So, this is my first fanfiction, and it kind of just came to me, it's really short but it's kind of supposed to be that way. Basically, each chapter is written as I listen to a song (title of the chapter) on repeat. Yeah.I sound like an idiot, I apologize.**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned these things, but alas, my dream is not met.**

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><p>September Skyline<p>

"Just get in the car," he was exasperated. After weeks of trying to convince the nerd to take this cross-country adventure instead of going to college for the fall semester, the girl was having second thoughts, on their set date to travel.

"Why don't we just stay here?" she suggested, not so helpfully.

"Or... you could get in the car." He shut the driver side door and walked over to his girlfriend. "What's wrong?" he placed his hands on her hips.

"What if we run out of ham?" she posed seriously.

"We have that planned out, if we have no ham you have the right to make me pull over at the nearest store and purchase you ham," he kissed her temple. "Now, what's really bugging you?"

She bit her lip, "Nothing..." she looked away from him and mumbled.

"Princess Puckett what the chiz did you just say." he used one of her favorite words.

"Well, Freddork, what if..." she started to mumble again.

"Sam! Tell me, I'll make all your worries disappear," he pulled her closer, so that if she whispered again, he could make it out. This act just made her frustrated. With her super human strength, and his inability to resist anything she did, she pushed herself away and walked to the other side of the car. "SAM!"

She just smirks at him and gets in the driver's seat. "I'm perfectly fine." She adjusted her newly acquired seat and beckoned her boyfriend to get in the car.

"So, you just wanted to drive?" He asked as he got into the passenger seat.

"Pretty much, now, gimme some ham!" she held her hand out expectantly. A slice of meat was put there and it went directly into her mouth.

As she looked back to see if there were any cars in her way, he grabbed her hand and made her look at him. "You just wanted to drive?" Her eyes revealed something deeper than that.

"Uhhhhghhh... What if after this trip..." She lost her courage and all she wanted to do was hit the boy in front of her and hop out of the car and just start running.

"What if after this trip, we don't like each other?" He finished for her. He had enough courage for both of them, but also the same fears. All she did was nod. "Then we'll cross that bridge when we come to it." He paused. "Or if we take your approach, we'll probably just burn it and find a different way to go."

This sparked a laugh from her, but not much reassurance. He loved it when she laughed. He could have sat there for hours just watching her laugh. But after the laughter subsided, she got serious. "Are we gonna be okay?"

He looked at her, "I don't know." And just like the last time he couldn't answer one of her questions, she got mad and stormed out of the car. He was quick and caught her before she started to get her things out of the trunk. "Samantha."

"Fredward." she said back, indignantly. "If neither of us even knows whether or not we'll be okay, why are we even doing this?" He knew she thought they were getting too close. That if they went on this trip, he'd get to _know_ her. Know her for more than the facade she put on every day.

"We're doing this, because right now. Right here. We love each other." He took her hands away from the trunk latch and led her to the curb. They sat and even though he could tell she wanted to flee, she didn't.

"Hey, nub," she leaned into him.

"Yeah?" he put his arm around her. These were the moments he loved. Not that he didn't love the fast pace of their lives but when they sat like this and slowed down, he loved it all the more.

"Love you too." He kissed her forehead. They sat for an eternity (really only like five minutes).

"Are we ready to go then? We have a vague schedule to keep." He began to stand but she pulled him back down. "Sa-" her name was cut off by lips, her own on his. Though she wasn't really all that emotional, she could do one thing really well, kiss. After breaking for a breath, she got up and returned to her stolen driver's seat and waited for him to sit in the passenger seat.

"San Francisco, here we come." She took off speeding into the autumn skyline.

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><p><strong>Maybe more chapters? I already have one sorta planned out. Reviews are awesome as well. That was "September Skyline" by Single File. LISTEN TO IT.<strong>


	2. Tonight Tonight

**Yay, another chapter... DON'T expect this to happen often. I am flighty and I have things to do. **

**Disclaimer**: **I do not own iCarly... or the song. I may write one based on one of my songs but most likely I will never own any of them.**

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><p>Tonight, Tonight<p>

They stared at each other from across the cheap motel room.

"So..." She tried to break through the tension. His expression just got more even furious than before. "I'm sorry." She tried to step closer to him, but he backed off.

"Sam!" There was so much about that girl that could infuriate him. "You. Cheated. On. Me." He angrily stepped into the middle of the room.

"I. Did. Not." She also stepped into the middle of the room, just less angrily than her partner.

"So, you call making out with that..." He struggled for the correct term, "...hobknocker, not cheating?"

"No, because I didn't 'make out' with him," she plainly stated. "I just really wanted his ham, but really didn't want to pay for it."

"Oh, you paid for it all right. With your lips."

"It's called a distraction. Did you _try_ his ham?" She got closer to him, also called a distraction.

"Stop," he pushed her an arm's length away, "And yes I did try his ham, I would have bought it for you."

"I didn't want to ask you, baby, you've already gotten me so much." She tried to take his hand. He retracted.

"I just need to go for a while," he brought her closer and pressed their foreheads together. And in an instant he was out the door.

She sat on the bed and instead of crying, all she wanted to do was trash the place and leave without him. She settled for tearing up a crappy pillow and watching a pay-per-view MMA fight. Just as her favorite fighter was about to be knocked out, she fell asleep, as the fighting had been less than amusing.

He returned late, well more like early in the morning, and slipped into bed as quietly as he could so he wouldn't disturb her.

"Why do you have a tattoo of Zach Galifianakis?" She asked when he woke up to her lifting his shirt.

"What? Why are you messing with my shirt? I'm still kinda mad at you." He said, even though the anger was lessened.

Ignoring his questions, she asked her own, "And why does it kinda look like me?"

Still groggy he replied, "What the chiz are you going on about?" He looked at the place she was staring at and was insulted by a tattoo of what seemed to be his girlfriend and Zach Galifianakis's hermaphrodite love child. He was stunned into silence.

"Wait. No. This is only permanent marker, but damn someone did a fine job screwing you over," she reassured him, which also made him think she did it.

"Sam..." He said disapprovingly.

"Well, you know I'm bad at drawing myself, and I may have gotten distracted by _The Hangover_. Which reminds me, can we go to Vegas next? And hey, you were the one who didn't notice someone drawing on them." They sat in silence for a bit. "Do you forgive me?" She stated, hopeful.

He let her sweat for a full '60-one thousands', then answered, "Yeah. But there's one thing we need to do before we leave here." From the beginning, even from the moment he saw her kiss the ham-seller, he knew he would forgive her, he just wanted to make her sweat a bit, maybe feel some remorse.

"What?" Freddie just smiled and told her to put on some nice clothes.

"Fredwad, I swear to the ham gods that if you don't tell me where we are going I'm going to-"

"What? What are you going to do? You're blindfolded and I'm driving so even if you do manage to hit me, you'll die too." He explained to her.

"AT LEAST I WOULD KNOW WHERE I WAS GOING!"

"Sam, just calm down." He put a free hand on hers.

"HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO CALM DOWN? SOMEONE HAS MY HAND!" He retracted his hand but said nothing. As he attempted to park the car he may have given the vehicles next to him a slight kiss, which seemed to unnerve her even more. He was never a good driver, which was the main reason she had wanted to drive in the first place.

"We're here," he stated, wondering if he should get out of the car.

"Can I take the blind fold off then?" She asked, almost willing to rip the damn thing off. "Momma wants to know where she is."

"Just wait my blond-headed demon." He got out of the car and opened the door for her. Even though she as blind folded, she refused to let him help her out of the car. Instead, she hopped down from the seat and plummeted to the rocky ground. "Smooth." He said as he helped her up. This resulted in a wayward punch that never really made it's target.

"Well if _someone_ hadn't blind folded me, this might not have happened." As the comebacks bubbled up to his lips, he kept quiet and let the accusation slide. All he did was take off the tie he had used to blind fold her and put it on his neck.

"Where are we?" Her eyes adjusted to the light.

"Hollywood," he stated. "Well, a party on top of the Hollywood sign."

"No. Way. How?" She wondered how the nub had access to such an exclusive event.

"Remember that time we met Kenan?" She nodded. "Well after we got back at the scuzball who was cheating on Carly, I helped Kenan with some technical stuff and just now got to call in the favor." The gesture of the party was so nice she almost felt guilty for kissing the meat seller. Almost. That ham was pretty darn tasty.

"Aw... Frederly has connections!" Was all she could say as a thank you. It was like her body was hardwired to insult anyone near her.

"You know it babe," he took her hand and they headed for the party. "Just promise me you won't push anyone off the edge."

"I won't. Unless they touch my ham. Or if it's Ginger Fox. Or that Wade Collins guy. They're all fair game," he just chuckled as he began to dance awkwardly with his travel buddy.

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><p><strong>That was Tonight Tonight by Hot Chelle Rae... you probably know it. Yeah, I have a wide range of music.<strong>


	3. Waking Up in Vegas

**Yeah, I'm not really sure how this is happening... I am actually writing, PLEASE do not expect it. I will probably get tired of this. I went a little stereotypical with the whole Vegas thing, but Sam wanted to go so... Also, these seem to be getting longer as I go... I hope you appreciate that.  
><strong>

**Disclaimer**: **If I owned iCarly... yeah I would probably still let Dan do everything. Also the song is not mine.  
><strong>

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><p>Waking Up In Vegas<p>

"Sam, what is this?" He looked at the tiny plastic rectangle she held in front of him.

"Your fake ID," she said like it was the most natural thing, a fake ID.

"Nub Nubbington, Nubbiest Lord of The Nubs" he read off the name on the card. "Ha. Ha. Funny. So not fake." She pulled out another card.

"Okay, okay, here's the real one," she handed him the other card to inspect.

"Ted Smith. Where did you get these anyway?" He asked her as he looked closely at the license.

"Well, you know my cousin-" He stopped her right there.

"Never mind, if we get caught I want plausible deniability."

"So, ready to gamble some money away?" She seemed really excited.

"Wait. Remember, we're only going to bet three hundred dollars, and once it's run out, we're going back to the motel. And this money," He held out about one hundred dollars, "is for taxis."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." She grabbed his hand and practically sprinted out to find the nearest casino.

"What the chiz happened? And why does my head hurt so much?" She asked him. "Why are you covered in glitter?"

"Stop yelling..." He curled up into fetal position, as if that would help the throbbing pain in his head. "And you're covered too."

"I'm not yelling." She assessed her surroundings, "Where the hell are we?" It seemed to be some sort of hallway of a dingy motel... she looked up at the door above her. "What room did we get Freddifer?"

"1002." He said, slightly coming out of his self-made cocoon.

"Well, this is it... where's the key?" He looked in his wallet but found no room key.

"Heh... about the key..." He began.

"You don't have it?" She was slightly irritated. "Well that explains why we're out here... Do you remember anything from last night?"

"Um...puking... winning... puking some more... getting kicked out... Elvis... umm..." He strained his mind to think coherently, but to no avail.

"Let's go to the front desk and get another key." She attempted to get up but fell right back down, he just looked like he was gonna puke. She tried one more time successfully then extended her arm to help him up.

"Um... Sam... Why are you wearing my class ring? And a gold band? On your ring finger, like where a wedding ring would..." He couldn't finish the sentence. He looked at his finger and found a gold band. She sat back down, stunned.

"Did we get hitched last night?" Sam put her head in her hands, like it would somehow jog her memories. They looked at each other at the same time...

"ELVIS." They stated. And then thing really got awkward. Both were too hung over to actually want to discuss something really serious, but they also knew they needed to talk about it.

"Let's just get the room key and we'll discuss this later," he suggested and she nodded. They both got up at the same time, glitter trailing behind them as they walked. He attempted to hold her hand but she shied away, like he had given her an electric shock.

After sleeping for what seemed like days, but was probably only 4 hours, she awoke feeling a whole lot better than before. She found herself with her head on his chest and his arm around her. As much as she felt the urge to put spray cheese in his hand and tickle his nose, she resisted and lay in a half-asleep daze.

"So, are we married?" He asked, noticing she was now awake.

"I don't know." She plainly stated. "Do you _feel_ married?"

"Truthfully?" He asked as she played with her hair. "I've felt like I was married since we started this journey." She looked up at him oddly. "Well, I mean, we do all that married person stuff, we fight, we... make out, we go on trips. I just didn't want to put a label on it because I didn't think you wanted it to." She got up. "Sam, don't be mad that I love you."

"You're right. I don't want a label." She said, not looking at him. She turned around. "Marriage doesn't mean squat unless we want it to. I've seen a fail relationship. I just don't want you to walk out like my dad did." He put his hand on her cheek.

"You don't want labels?" She nodded. "Fine, we can pretend we're not married until you actually want to be married. Just do one thing for me."

"Do something for Nub Nubbington?" She scoffed.

"Yes Princess Puckett." He kissed her, to make sure she was in the mood to agree with him. "Keep the ring on."

"Why?" She wondered, pulling away from him.

"Because I want all the ham sellers out there to know that you are mine." He showed a possessive side that rarely poked its head.

"Fine." She gave in and went for a kiss. "All I really know is that I do not want to stay her for much longer." She looked around the dinky room. "I mean it's cool for a bit but I'm done with Vegas."

"Can't we stay a little longer?" He asked as he pulled her closer to him.

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><p><strong>Waking Up in Vegas by Katy Perry. It's not really exactly the same... but none of them have really been. Again I have a wide range of music... Who knows where they'll show up next?<strong>


	4. Arizona

**Apparently they'll end up in Arizona. Sorry it's been a while, I've had college things to do... Yes. I'm in college... Yes, I still watch iCarly. DEAL. I already have the next two chapters planned so, I hope it won't be as long of a wait.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing of iCarly. Nor do I own the song. I do however own BBB auto services (my veiled attempt at not using AAA).**

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><p>Arizona<p>

"When are we gonna get out of this dump?" She asked as she shoved her head out the window as he drove. It wasn't something she'd normally do, the whole letting him drive, but if she had to pass another old lady, she'd probably kill him. At least at his speeds, they would only have to worry about old ladies passing them. But with his speeds that also meant they had to avoid interstates as much as possible, which was why she was just staring at desert.

"It's not a dump. It's the desert and it's a beautiful land mark." he chided her.

"Do you seriously believe that? It's just hot, dry sand." she banged on the car door.

"You're the one who wanted to see the Grand Canyon," he reminded her.

"Well, that's cuz I thought it'd be prettier. Like all green and luscious." He gave her a 'seriously?' look.

"Did you ever pay attention in school?" It was her turn to shoot him a look, only hers wasn't as friendly.

She stayed quiet for a while and he even got her to hold his hand for a bit until the car decided it didn't feel like driving any more.

"NUB!" She said, exasperated, throwing her arms up in the air. "Look what you have done! YOU BROKE THE CAR!"

"I did not!" He shifted the car into neutral and she got out of the car to push. After getting it off the road, he noticed the fire. "Sam, I think I did break the car..."

Just as she was about to gloat, she noticed what he was referring to, took his hand and ran about half a mile down the road. He looked at her strangely, out of breathe. "Burning car, not good," was all she could get out.

After catching her breath, she pulled out her wallet, she was never one for purses... or wallets really but she needed something to keep her license and emergency ham in. After she downed the ham to calm her nerves she took out her BBB Card.

"Phone." She held out her hand, she had left hers in the car and hoped beyond hope that he had grabbed his. He fished around in his pants' pockets until he remembered it was in his shirt pocket. "Aww... what would I do without your geeky shirt pocket?" She gave him a kiss before taking the phone.

"So, our car stopped working and I'm pretty sure it's on fire." She told the worker after about five minutes of pressing numbers.

"Just tell us where you are and we'll get you assistance as fast as we can." She told the lady where she thought she was and was redirected to a Nevada BBB company that could better "help". She told her story again and was told the wait would be four hours and it would be better to call the operator to ask for the number of a local towing agency. She hung up the phone, frustrated and threw it at him. He looked at her confused, but she just told him to call the operator and get a local towing agency. If it was possible to kill someone through a phone, she could have done it.

They eventually got a local towing company to give them an estimate of an hour wait. They didn't dare go back to the car, but she had run out of emergency ham. So on top of being frustrated with him, the towing company and the phone, she was hungry. She started to walk down the road.

"Where are you going?" He asked the blond headed demon.

"I don't know! Florida!" She called over her shoulder.

"That's like a million miles away," he replied, but started going after her.

"Then I'm going home!" She didn't stop.

"It's like a million mile there too... And in the other direction. Plus we have to stay with the car."

She turned around. "Why do you have to always be right?"

"Luck?" He answered honestly. "You're right too sometimes... Like with the car."

"Yeah, well... Leave it to a nub not to know anything about cars," she was forgetting that she was mad.

"So... what do you want to do for an hour?" He looked at the ground and kicked a rock.

"Well... I can think of one thing..." She put her hand on his upper arm and stepped closer. He looked up with gleaming eyes. She got even closer to him and grinned evilly, but before he could register the facial expression and turn the situation in his favor, she yelled "LET'S PLAY I-SPY!" She stepped away from the emotionally confused boy and looked around, "I spy with my little eye... something yellow." He said nothing. "Guess!"

"Sand," he said monotonously.

"You're good. It's your turn!" He wondered what she was trying to get at.

"I spy something I want to kiss." He looked right in her eyes.

"The cactus?" She appeared serious while saying it but as soon as the words left her lips she started to crack. And when he smiled at her, she burst out laughing. "Come to momma," she opened her arms after the laughter subsided. He closed the gap between them and placed a hand on the small of her back. Both leaned their heads in and closed their eyes.

An hour later a confused tow-man found an abandoned car, that had long since stopped burning (it turned out to be a paper towel that had heated too much), and two teens kissing under a tree about 500 yards away from the car.

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><p><strong>That was Arizona by Hey Monday. Um... so. Yeah. I'm a nub who doesn't know anything about cars, BUT I do know Sam can push a car. I saw it. <strong>


End file.
